Thirty-one, that does not mean that men do not seek intimacy, love, and connection in a relationship, just as women do; most men crave more foreplay, they just view the role of sex differently. Women want to talk first, connect first, and then have sex.
Thirty-two, for men, sex is the connection. Sex is the language men use to express their tender loving vulnerable side. It is their language of intimacy. Study after study illustrates that men’s sex drives are not only stronger than women’s are, but also much more straightforward.
Thirty-three, the sources of women’s libidos, by contrast, are much more difficult to pin down. It is common wisdom that women place more value on emotional connection as a spark of sexual desire.
Thirty-four, men want sex more often than women at the start of a relationship, in the middle of it, and after many years of it. About two-thirds say they masturbate, even though they feel guilty about it, they are forced to masturbate because they are constantly being refused by their wives. Eighty something percentage of married men confessed having cheated on their wives though they say they feel guilty about it, they also gave the reason for this – their wives’ deliberate insensitivities to their sexual fantasies, need and lack of innovation and tastelessness.
Thirty-five, men and women travel slightly different paths to arrive at sexual desire. I hear women say in my office that sexual desire originates much more between their ears than between their legs. For most married women, there is a need for a plan hence, the romance affection and the foreplay.
Thirty-six, it is more about the anticipation, how you get there; it is the longing that is the fuel for desire. Women’s desire is more contextual, more subjective, more layered on a lattice of emotion. Men, by contrast, don’t need to have nearly as much imagination, since sex is simpler and more straightforward for them.
Thirty-seven, most married women are more influenced by the attitudes of their peer group in their decisions about sex. Wives who are not ‘religious’ are likely to have liberal attitudes about sex, they let go and release themselves to the pleasure sex has to offer than the most ‘religious’ ones.
Thirty-eight, married women with higher education levels are more likely to have performed a wider variety of sexual practices; education made less of a difference with men. Women are more likely to show inconsistency between their expressed values about sexual activities.
Thirty-nine, most married women under age 60 think about sex less than once a day.
Forty, while the majority of married men under 60 think about sex at least once a day, only about one-quarter of married women report this level of frequency.
Forty-one, as men and women age, each fantasise less, but married men still fantasise about twice as often.
Forty-two, men reported more spontaneous sexual arousal and had more frequent and varied fantasies. There are beautifying natural libido enhancers that can help women, please contact me.
Forty-three, older married women are more likely to experience orgasm when sex is within the context of a faithful and loving relationship.
Forty-four, married women over 50 are more likely to report orgasm when a sexual event takes place in a totally strange environment.
Forty-five, researchers speculate that long separated spouses coming together may find the novelty of a new experience arousing.
Forty-six, most second round sex is safe and healthy, sex therapists say. In addition, it can improve sexual function and relationships by teaching both spouses about their own sexual responses, so they are better able to explain to their partner what feels good to them. However, a spouse who becomes too obsessed with third round sex may develop sexual problems or lose interest in sex with their partners.
Forty-seven, women experience orgasms differently from men, while researchers find it tricky to try to quantify issues like the differing quality of male vs. female orgasms, they do have data on how long it takes men and women to get there.
Forty-eight, men on average take four minutes from the point of entry until ejaculation; [ideal time should be at least 10 minutes] anything lower than this is considered to be premature ejaculation. If you suffer premature ejaculation, please contact me. Women usually take around 15 to 18 minutes to reach orgasm.
Forty-nine, that is another difference between the sexes on how often they have an orgasm during sex. Among married men, 75 per cent of them report that they always have an orgasm with their wives while 29 per cent of married women report that they always have an orgasm with their husbands.
Fifty, most married women cannot have an orgasm without direct stimulation of the clitoris, so they need clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm. For women who have trouble achieving orgasm, incorporating clitoral stimulation into sexual activity may be all that is necessary.
Fifty-one, the G-spot is a sexually sensitive part of a woman’s anatomy found in the anterior vaginal wall. The G-spot is a region found behind the pubic bone that has been credited as the trigger for a vaginal (vs. clitoral) orgasm, and even a catalyst for female ejaculation.
Fifty-two, however, some experts note that there is no unique anatomical structure where the G-spot is supposed to be located. If the G-spot exists, it is best described as an erogenous zone rather than a part of a woman’s anatomy.
Fifty-three, a study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that the duration before an average married man ejaculates during sexual intercourse from the beginning of vaginal penetration until ejaculation was 7.4 minutes, while the appropriate time should be 12 to 15 minutes.
Fifty-four, the average penis length is between eight and 10 inches when erect and averages around 4.6 inches when flaccid.
Fifty-five, a man’s flaccid penis varies in size considerably because of various environmental factors and their effects on the sympathetic nervous system. Cold water and cold air are perhaps the best-known causes of this “shrinkage” phenomenon, but psychological stress can do the same thing.
Fifty-six, it is advisable to stay off stress and if you have a shrinking penis, kindly contact me.
Fifty-seven, only 10 per cent of married men reported a preference for oral sex to achieve orgasm, while six per cent of married women reported that preference. Men are more likely to reach orgasm when sex includes vaginal intercourse, but women are more likely to reach orgasm when they engage in a variety of sex acts that include vaginal intercourse or real foreplay sex.
Fifty-eight, masturbation can cause injury; frequent or overly vigorous masturbation can irritate the skin of the penis, and men who masturbate facedown can injure their urethras; this has been a major cause of erectile dysfunction for many who masturbate.
Fifty-nine, sexual activity can reduce the risk of stroke and heart attack in older couples. While couples with a history of stroke or heart disease should consult their sex therapist about sexual activity, for the most part, sex is a healthy form of exercise for older people.
Sixty, researchers who tracked 914 married men for 20 years found that having sex twice or more a week reduced the risk of fatal heart attack by half, compared with those who had sex less than once a month. They also found frequency of sex was not associated with stroke.
Credit: Funmi Akingbade, Punch
If you missed part 1 of the essay, read it below:
Sex at its best in sixty ways (1), By Funmi Akingbade